i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i think i have herpe
just one?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
areolas are like halos for boobs.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Randomize
