This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
