did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume