i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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