the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
