somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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