Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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