I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize