i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
