similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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