is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
