Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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