I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
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