for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
