I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggles of a small town man whore
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.