True but thats because hes a fetus.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
