i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
