My room smells like vodka and shame
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize