Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
