Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
