we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
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