I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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