She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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