If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i think i have two assholes
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize
