Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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