Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
