the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
this will be a night to untag.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
