I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Randomize
