He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize