can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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