One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize