yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
