Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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