people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize