hell yes lets make some ravioli
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
