Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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