I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
we're so committed to being not committed
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
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