marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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