Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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