what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Do vagina's smell?
Four minutes until I can fart!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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