Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
