The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
