am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize