grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
