Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
sex in a hospital.. check
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
