I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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