I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
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