the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize