I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
