Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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