I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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