I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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