Whats the glycemic index on semen?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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